My new 10-Week creativity program “Strings of Passion” opened on Tuesday and I got this message yesterday via the “Jamlog Collectomatic,” an anonymous sharing form I created that lets people share what’s happening with them without having to put their name on it. (You can read more about the Jamlog Collectomatic here)
In addition to the message itself, people tell me how sharable it is (this one was labeled “Aaaggh! I don’t know – do whatever you think is best”) and the type of message was described as “Revelation Inspiration Frustration Message from one of my petty demons and A message of scared love from my fear voice.”
So I was already intrigued. Here’s what it said:
“I have realised that basically the only time I truly show up for myself, my music, my passion and my talent is when I step on stage and I am connecting with people in the flesh.
I feel as if I am channeling something greater that myself and I am connected with my heart and the response is beautiful, with people crying at times feeling touched this is what life is about connecting.
However in my day to day I feel my demons come up so frequently to tell me all the things that could go wrong and I am a bad person and won’t “make it” therefore it is not worth trying as I will fail anyway.
Comparing myself to others and think I will never get there. Forgetting that we all have to stay in our OWN LANE we are all different and unique with different gifts.
I have never been ‘good’ at practicing. I seem to knock myself down before I have even started. I find it uncomfortable facing that I am not good at something or find something hard – that I am a ‘beginner’.
It has been beautiful to hear you DHC talk about being a constant beginner and embracing this – WOW!
I have come to the harp later on in life and am a real beginner with the harp – however I have been singing and writing songs for years and I feel I have found my instrument but I don’t know how to truly practice and be ‘disciplined.’
I know how to be spontaneous and write songs from the heart and improvise but not so much on demand…
I am feeling overwhelmed and amazed and inspired to be in HipHarp Academy. I know this is the push I have needed for so long but yet the demons are shouting so loud that I will not be taken seriously.
Deborah you said that beginners were welcome and that made me feel so happy but I start to think maybe I have gone in at the deep end.
I want to be professional as a singer songwriter I have fallen for the harp to accompany me, I know that simple on the harp works so well and this has been my way in and my experience to let my voice sore.
I DO NOT WANT MY DEMONS TO DICTATE HOW I LIVE MY LIFE ANYMORE —– THIS IS A CRY OUT, A PRAYER, A RAMBLE FROM A HEART WANTING TO LOVE AND BE LOVED AND NOT HIDE AWAY … TO SHOW UP FOR MYSELF FOR MY FAMILY FOR MY FRIENDS FOR YOU ALL FOR THE WORLD, IF WE CAN SHOW UP FOR OURSELVES AND FACE OUR FEARS WE CAN SHOW UP FOR EVERYONE AND THEY WILL DO THE SAME!!!!
I am sorry this is not brief it just came out this way and I don’t know how to make it shorter, I hope it is okay.”
Yes …. this is so OK. And here’s what I know. When we speak the truth – as raw as we feel speaking it, we are speaking for so many people on so many levels. And when we do show up – even when it’s to share our fear – honestly and directly – we open a door for others.
Thank you, Anonymous.
Are YOU in?
>> Register Now at StringsofPassion.com <<
Deadline to Register: Midnight Tue. Jan. 17 EST